Books by John and Linda Friel
NEW FOR OCTOBER 2000!!
WHAT TEENS AND EXPERTS AND A COUPLE OF SCOTS ARE SAYING ABOUT IT...
"The messages this
book contains are so logically insightful that they
"The 7 Best Things
(Smart) Teens Do is a clear, easy-to-read book which
"Thank you for letting
me read this wonderul book. The 7 Best Things
"This book is funny at
times, but also very serious. There is a great
"Drawing from many
resources, this book successfully deals with the
"I wish this book had
been available to me and my parents when I was a
"Few people question
the fact that young people are challenges.
"With hindsight, my
adolescence was marred by
"The 7 Worst Things (Good) Parents Do" Is Now On Audiotape! See Order Form!
HOW TO AVOID.....
YOU WON’T LIKE EVERYTHING
YOU READ HERE
* When was the last time you and your mate went away, overnight, without the kids?
* Do you think it’s great to be your child’s pal?
* Have you deprived your child of the right to have inner structure and impulse control? Does she have any patience? Is he respectful?
* Are you too invested in the career your child chooses? Do you expect your kids to become something they aren’t supposed to become?
* Are you and your kids overworked, over-scheduled, frazzled, sick, and tired?
* Is there any time in your lives for you and your family to contemplate, reflect, and connect? Do you find the universe to be awe-inspiring, or can’t you be bothered by such a question?
* Are you tripping over the ghosts of your own past when you try to raise your kids?
To read the Table Of Contents of each book, please continue to scroll down this page...
THE 7 BEST THINGS (SMART) TEENS DO $12.95 300 pages approx.
Preface: In The Beginning.........................….........................................…………………...
Part I: The Agony And The Ecstasy, The Power And The Glory
1. The Parrot, The Appalachian Science Student, The Suburban Lawyer, The Media Rep, The Murderers And The Vandal, And The Grace In South Central LA
2. Thumb Your Nose At Gravity
3. The Cockapoo And The Labrador
Part II: The 7 Best Things
4. Become Competent: You Can’t Get Self Esteem From Talking To Yourself In Front Of The Mirror Or Being Smothered With Praise
5. Master Your Feelings: Don’t Let The Tail Wag The Dog
6. Break The Silence: It Takes So Much Energy To Silently Scream
7. Get Healthy Power: Learn To Respectfully Make Things Happen
8. Face The Serious Stuff: Some Things Are Too Big To Keep Buried
9. Find An Identity: From Accepting Without Question To Discovering Your Own Path
10. Start Learning To Stake Out The Extremes: It’s The Universal Skill
11. The Labrador And The Cockapoo
Part III: Some Tips
12. Becoming Competent
13. Mastering Feelings
14. Breaking The Silence
15. Getting Healthy Power
16. Facing The Serious Stuff
17. Finding An Identity
18. Staking Out The Extremes
Part IV: Bringing It All Back Home
19. And in The End…
THE SOUL OF ADULTHOOD: OPENING THE DOORS $9.95
This is the book that everyone has been waiting for. Whether you are an adult who is ready to move past the woundedness of childhood, or want to deepen your life by embracing its complexities, or a clinician who is wondering how to help move your clients from childhood to adult hood--this is the book for you. It is filled with therapeutic double-binds, marvelous challenges, and 15 years of personal and clinical insights into the process of deepening and strengthening the self--and the soul. It is the book designed to help create depth through simplicity.
1. Life's Delicate Structures
THE DOORS TO ADULTHOOD
5. The Unconscious
8. Self-Esteem Myths
9. The Dignity of Loneliness
13. Beyond Dysfunctional Roles
14. Victim to Adult
15. Love, Power and Graciousness
18. Integrity, Honor, and Accountability
19. Tradition, Structure, and Discipline
20. Faith, Hope, and Spirituality
21. The Prices and the Payoffs of Adulthood
ADULT CHILDREN: THE SECRETS OF DYSFUNCTIONAL FAMILIES $8.95
The original best-selling book that has been hailed as the clearest explanation of what works and what does not work in family systems and in growing up. With over 300,000 copies sold, this is the essential work for those who are seeking a clearer, fuller understanding of personal and family health and dysfunction. We have received hundreds of letters over the years from readers who have found hope, discovery, and healing as a result of reading this book.
2. Two Stories
3. Who Are We? What Are Our Symptoms?
4. Some Hooks: Addictions In Particular
5. The Bear
6. Family Systems: Structure, Function, Roles, Boundaries
7. The Traps Get Set
8. When Families Get Off Course
9. The Goose
WHAT HAPPENS TO ME?
10. The Denial
11. The Feelings
12. The Secrets
13. What Happens To Our Identity
14. Intimacy and Beyond
15. The Rabbit
BENEATH THE ICEBERG
16. A General Model of Adult Children and Co-dependency
RECOVERING: WHAT DO I DO NOW?
17. Uncovering and Admitting
18. Working a Program
19. A Word About Healing and Spirituality
20. Kiss Your Monster on the Nose
AN ADULT CHILD'S GUIDE TO WHAT'S "NORMAL" $9.95
This book is the practical, handy, infinitely readable guide to troubleshooting problems and struggles that face us all. Each chapter is 2-4 pages long, and each covers a common issue such as setting boundaries, taking care of self, identifying and responding well to shame, etc. It is the kind of book that you can flip through at your leisure, or pick up when faced with a knotty problem that is keeping you stuck. It is still one of the most popular self-help books on the market.
THE ROAD TO BEING FUNCTIONAL
1. Sixty-Five Characteristics of Adult-Children Becoming Functional
2. How To Use This Book
3. From Shame and Blame To Respect and Healthy Love
4. Caught In A Trap Or Living A Life
5. Basic Principles Of Functional Living
6. The Wisdom of the Bear
7. Where's the Manual For This Family?
(Overt and Covert Rules)
8. Unhooking Pointers
TAKING CARE OF THE ONE WHO'S IN CHARGE
9. Feelings (What Am I Feeling?)
10. Accept the Unexpected
11. When I'm Lonely
12. All Stressed Out With Nowhere To Go
13. This, Too, Shall Pass (When You're Having A Bad Day)
14. Play: Celebrating Our Spirit and Our Humaneness
15. On Rejection
16. Be Kind To Yourself
17. Journaling: Make It For You and Make It Safe
18. May God Hold You in the Palm of His Hand
YOU ARE WHAT YOU THINK (SOMETIMES)
19. Perfectionism: The 20% Mess-up Factor and the Epitaph Test
20. When To Let Go and When To Fight
21. The Myth of Permanence
22. Lay Down and Die/Sue the Bastards
23. I Can Work This Out Myself
24. You Mean I Have Choices?
25. Just Because You Believe It Doesn't Make It Real
26. The Otters
BOUNDARIES: GETTING TRICKED, STAYING CLEAR
27. Re-Enactments: History Does Repeat Itself
28. Abused by an Eyebrow
29. Some Shaming Statements to Watch For
30. When People Say Inappropriate or Abusive Things To Me
31. Get an Answering Machine
32. Uninvited Guests
33. Combating the "Gotcha Syndrome" I: Why Didn't I See That One Coming?
34. Combating the "Gotcha Syndrome" II: I'll Think About It and Let You Know Tomorrow
35. Confronting Those Crazy Cons (Fool Me Once...)
36. Confronting Those Crazy Cons: What To Do or Say
WANTING LOVE BUT TIRED OF THE PAIN
37. Is Co-dependency Something New?
38. Caring Without Being Co-dependent
39. How Do I End This Relationship?
40. What Couples Fight About and How They Resolve It
42. Breaking Out Of the Owe/Pay Syndrome
43. What Is a Healthy Friendship I: It Takes All Kinds
44. What Is a Healthy Friendship II: Those Close Friendships
45. Ask For What You Need (They Aren't Mind Readers)
46. How Does This Relationship Feel?
47. The Error of Narcissism (They Don't Brag About Their Kids or Make You Watch slides of Their Vacation)
SOME FAMILY STUFF
48. If You Pity Your Parents, You Have Been Abused By Them
49. What Is a Functional Family?
50. From Holiday Horrors to Happy Holy Days
51. My Kids Don't Help Around the House
52. What to Expect From Your Teenagers
53. How Much Do I Tell My Kids?
54. When My Teenager is Going To Have a Baby
55. Those In-Laws!
56. What To Expect When Our Parents Grow Old
57. The Bear: Continued
MOVING ON INTO LIFE
58. There Is No Failure
THE GROWN-UP MAN: HEROES, HEALING, HONOR, HURT, HOPE $9.95
Based on 15 years of experience working with men and men's therapy groups, John Friel takes you on a journey that invites awareness, recognition of typical "male" problems, issues in relationships, what it means to be a grown-up man, and how to get there. Thousands of women have appreciated the insights that it brings to being with men in the world, as well. In a time when it is confusing for men and women to be in the world together, a book like this can be a priceless addition to one's library.
HOW WE HURT
1. Men On the Way To the 90's
2. Over-Mothered, Under-Fathered: The Betrayed Male Syndrome
3. Silly Things That Dysfunctional Men Do
FATHERS AND HEROES
4. Some Things I Learned From My Dad
6. What Are Dads Good For
AND GOD MADE THEM MALE AND FEMALE
7. Who's Better: Men or Women?
8. Males and Females Together
9. Female Dependency: From Offender-Little Boys to Real Men
10. Once Upon a Time
HOPE, HEALING AND HONOR
A11. Healing Our Father Wound
12. Men in Recovery/Men in Group
13. Noticing and Listening
14. Be a Man of Integrity and Honor
15. In Search of a True Human Being
AFTER ALL IS SAID AND DONE
16. Take Some Little Risks
RESCUING YOUR SPIRIT: WHEN THIRD-GRADE MORALITY ISN+T ENOUGH FOR CHRISTIANS $9.95
After working for years with people whose spirits had been damaged by childhood abuse or neglect, as well as by rigidly-practiced religions, John Friel wrote this book to give people an alternative to tossing out their religious beliefs along with the wounds from the past. It is a celebration of all that is good about religion and spirituality, as well as an explanation of what can go wrong if religion is practiced in a distorted way.
1. My First Encounter With Christian Hatred
2. The Heights of Spirit
3. In the Beginning
4. Hell on Earth: How Our Spirits Get Damaged
5. If Jesus Christ Had Wanted Us To Think, He Would Have Spoken To Us In Parables
6. Daddy, What's a Myth?
7. Beliefs, Re-enactments, and -The Vow+
8. Are Our Bodies Evil?
9. Sex, Sexual Abuse, and Christianity
10. The Pharisees and Hypocrites: Shame, Fear, Prejudice, and Ignorance
11. Sin, Accountability, and Forgiveness
12. Embracing the Many Faces of Prayer
13. Dare To Be a Christian With Your Mind, Heart, and Feet
14. To Think and Hope
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